Remember that horrible theme song to that very mysterious show titled, "Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" To this day, I still have no idea what that show was about. But take a listen to the theme song:

Now sing this to the same beat: What in the world is going on in SACRAMENTO?

Two very odd stories are taking shape in Sacramento with the Kings. The first is owner and general manager saying they have no interest in trading stud center DeMarcus Cousins to USA Today and the Sacramento Bee, respectively.

“We have zero interest in moving Cousins, so I don’t know where that’s coming from,” Ranadive said when asked about an report in which a Kings-Los Angeles Lakers-Orlando Magic trade scenario was discussed. “But if you like, you should talk to (Kings vice president of basketball and franchise operations) Vlade (Divac), because I know Vlade feels exactly the same way. And I’m deferring to Vlade on everything. We have no interest in moving him. From my perspective, it’s really simple: we feel that he’s a one-of-a-kind player, and we have a group of players right now and we’re going to build on it.”

While Divac could not be reached for comment, he told The Sacramento Bee this week that a Cousins trade “is not happening, but I would love to do something, a smaller move, before the draft.”

And within a freakin’ hour of the USA Today story from Sam Amick, Yahoo! Sports’ Adrian Wojnarowski dropped a “sources” bomb on the NBA world with a report of his own:

Despite Sacramento Kings management’s public insistence that DeMarcus Cousins is unavailable in deals, coach George Karl’s intense desire to trade the All-Star center has made it increasingly unlikely this coach-star partnership can peacefully co-exist next season, league sources told Yahoo Sports.

Karl has been recruiting Kings vice president of basketball operations Vlade Divac and multiple players on the Kings’ roster to unite with him in making the case to owner Vivek Ranadive that Cousins needs to be traded, league sources said.

And, as we've been saying around these parts for a long time, Karl is believed to be in win now mode. Woj backed up those claims in his piece and pushed things further with this:

Most teams trying to trade into the lottery believe the Kings are determined to package the sixth overall pick to bring back veteran talent.

There are a whole lot of teams with veteran talent that wouldn't mind swapping some of their players for Cousins. The Nuggets could definitely be among the teams that try to get in on the Cousins sweepstakes, if such an event should ever take place. Denver and Sacramento have been linked to trade talks leading up to the draft, and many people believe that Ty Lawson was the featured name in trade talks, but the Nuggets could be pushing behind the scenes to reunite Cousins and Michael Malone.

And Cousins Tweeted this, around the time of the Woj bomb:

Something to keep in mind here. If the Kings feel that Karl and Cousins will not be able to repair any damage that may have been done over the last several months, the team could choose to part ways with Karl. There is likely distrust between Cousins and the Kings, since they fired the one coach he seemed to take to, so he could demand out. But if Vivek and Vlade have been steadfast with Cousins, don't be surprised if Karl is the odd man out.

With the Kings in the process of building a new arena, Cousins is their best link to the fanbase, and Karl surely hasn't done himself any favors with this rumor making it's way to the biggest basketball reporter in the game. The bad part, we don't even know if any of the 'Karl wants Boogie gone!' rumors are actually true, but they may have soured the relationship between player and coach, even further than they already were.

It's a horrible situation, but one that will captivate the NBA world until it is resolved. Nuggets fans went through their own misery with the Melodrama, so we know firsthand what it's like to see a star player want out of your city. But this feels different because Cousins hasn't been pushing to get out. What will happen next…