Head in to the head light
Don’t turn from the rain
There’s a fire raging somewhere near
like a long-time friend
who’s seen it darker than ebony.
Yes – The Calling
It's been an awful, awful season for me personally.
My grandmother died in December after a very stressful and painful last few months of her life. This distracted me immensely as I had to help my dad, uncle and aunt attend to her daily needs as she approached the end of her life. Watching the affect this had on my dad and my family as we dealt with grief was an extremely draining experience. This caused me to write less, and quite frankly lose some of the joy that I once had in writing. It's been hard to get that back.
Also, in all honesty, Nate Timmons leaving Denver Stiffs hit me alot harder than I was ever willing to admit. Nate, Andrew Feinstein and myself had built this Denver Nuggets website to what it has become. Our staff right now is amazing (Gordon, Mike, Kayla, Zach, Daniel and Gibson), and Adam Mares is doing a stupendous job managing the site. I think … I just missed my friend.
I must address this with Denver Stiffs readers. I haven’t written as much as I used to, and I’ve been concentrating primarily on videos and the podcast. I haven’t quite recovered the zeal that I had for writing that I did before, even during the last season when going to Pepsi Center was brutal and depressing as the Brian Shaw era was burning to the ground. My grandmother’s passing and other family issues kind left me at a crossroads.
On top of feeling exceedingly out of touch and old in the twitter world I've wondered if there is still a place for my type of writing. Is my perspective still valued in a world that demands use of vast analytic metrics? Am I still relevant? Is my mentality too "dinosaur" for the venue for which I write? Lets face it, there's only so many articles on the history of the Denver Nuggets and the calamitous business decisions they have made over the years.
The answer is likely no. Andy already has that covered and he does it much better than I do. It's hard to see the forest for the trees when you're feeling so negative.
Through, however, all the self-doubt and second guessing I've been going through this entire season I've come to the conclusion that whatever the bad thoughts in my head, my knowledge of Nuggets history and whatever I bring to this fun website is needed and in large measure I need to pull my head out of my ass. I think self doubt and questioning is something that is an inevitable part of doing what we do. Particularly after 6 years of writing. It happens.
I'm 37 going on 50. I'm older than my age so I really do NOT fit in the twitter world. You know what, I'll continue to be a angry old man because we all need the Charles Barkley's of the world to keep us on our toes.
I'm going to renew my commitment to keeping Denver Stiffs as the best Nuggets website on the web. New and exciting things are on the horizon as I'm embarking on a VERY large and special project that I'm sure that Nuggets fans all over the country and even the world will appreciate. You'll be hearing more about this in greater detail later.
The best is yet to come.
