Melo Called for Traveling
by Artimus Mangilord on Mar 19, 2010 9:27 AM MDT
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Fellow Stiff readers might find this Onion article amusing in the midst of all the serious discussion that otherwise goes on at this blog.... Link after the jump.
For anyone not familiar with The Onion, it is a satirical weekly paper. The basic premise of this article is Melo calling out league officials for calling him for TIME travelling at a crucial time in the recent loss to the Rockets. There are a few gems in there, such as this one:
The NBA claims it has always taken a hard stance on flagrant and repeat violators of the traveling-though-time rule, saying it wants to avoid a total breakdown of basketball causality as we know it. Borgia said he has evidence suggesting there are several parallel-universe NBAs, including one in which the Nuggets won 16 straight championships before moving to Luna City, a timeline in which Anthony's name figures heavily. In other alternate worlds, where time-traveling is never called, the Utah Jazz of the 1990s were led by famous married couple Karl Malone and John Stockton, who won five championships together; a great Magic Johnson/Larry Bird partnership blossomed in Atlanta; and the WNBA challenges the men's league for sports dominance.
Anyway, have a laugh and enjoy the fact that the Nuggets are off to their best start through 69 games (I think) in their history.
GO NUGGETS!!!
- Artimus
Write respectfully of your SB Nation community and yourself.
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Awesome.
Sometimes The Onion is good for only headlines. But this is a case where the entire article was just as brilliant.
Heh
Let’s PULL OFF 29 STRAIGHT WINS!
"Left hand, right hand, it doesn't matter. I'm amphibious." - Charles Shackleford
""He’s a stiff." - The Legendary Doug Moe
"We have a great bunch of outside shooters. Unfortunately, all our games are played indoors." - Weldon Drew
"I really didn't want it, but now that I've won it, it's nice. It's an honor. It's nice to know people don't think you're a total idiot. ... It must have been a poor year for coaches." - Doug Moe...talking about winning 1987-88 Coach of the Year award.
"We're just tough, man" - Chauncey Billups
hilariously enough this was on my side-bar
A man on the street-type deal—on the signing of LDT:
“The Jets are getting flak, but they plan on having him split time with Terrell Davis.”
Because Montana has no professional sports, I gotta support the land of my birth.
Socrates was once executed for 'trolling'.
^Needs explaining: don't call someone asking uncomfortable, slightly antagonistic questions trolls. In all odds they probably just want to learn. It's real easy to differentiate a 'Socratic' post from a trolling one (unless you're a resident of WCG).
^Needs further explaining: I have yet to post anything on WCG, don't worry, I'm not trying to rationalize anything I've done. I've just lurked over there and man, they are the model of post-peloponnesian war Athens.
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